As my university life is gradually coming to an end, I have gone through many situations in which I had to communicate with various people in a face-to-face manner, as a group, through emails and many other channels. I believe that good communication skills; let it be speaking or listening, are essential to life, as it is the basis through with one can build a good relationship with one’s family, colleagues, neighbours and anyone else you come in contact with, throughout your life.
I am a quiet person by nature and being quite shy too, I find talking in front of an audience to be a tedious and nerve wrecking task. There have been many instances when I have tried to get across a relatively simple message to my friends, group mates but which ended with them misunderstanding me. After a period of self reflection, I realized that the reason behind such incidents was somewhat related to my poor communication skills.
Since I have a lot of presentations coming up (especially my FYP presentation), it is important that I learn how to convey what I want to say to another person or a group in a clear and concise manner to ensure that there is no miscommunication. Thus, I need to get over my fears and so I hope that what I learn in this class will be a good starting point and would help me ‘fight the demons’, so to say.
Hey Mandhu, I understand what you mean by having a quiet and shy personality. That’s where I started from too! I was generally not one who would voluntarily raise my hands to answer questions or go up to the stage to play games, and many other things. In fact, till now, I still do envy people who have the courage to volunteer their answers in class or make random comments to the favour of their teachers. There were occasions I wondered why is it that outspoken students who enjoy making seemingly unconstructive comments in class can gain the favour of their teachers and earn high participation points. Was it their “gift” of humor? I then wondered if I too, should try to become like them. In the end, I did not resort to that as I thought that it would be fake of me.
ReplyDeleteWith regards to FYP presentations, I just had one quite terrible one in December! As I was giving my presentation, the examiner was hardly paying attention to what I was saying and was instead, constantly referring to the notes that I’d given him. Till now, I’m still not quite sure whether it was because I gave my presentation notes too early or my presentation was simply boring.
Through the years, I must say that I have been blessed with opportunities to enter leadership positions that forced me to take my communication skills up a notch. As you might guess, I never entered any of them willingly. However, though I still am not exactly that outspoken, I thank God I took up those positions that have forced me to practise and find ways to improve in my communication skills. I’m sure that you too will be given many opportunities, especially through ES2007S. And I hope that by the end of the semester, our whole class would be able to communicate more effectively than when we first stepped into the class! (:
P.S. Sorry for the really long comment haha.
Hey Madhu,
ReplyDeleteI’m also a quiet and shy person, who doesn’t really like to talk in front of a whole class. I think is because I’m not really confident of myself and afraid to make mistake. Like for example, for the last lesson, the observer have to share with the whole class about what he observe from the speaker and listener, and I have to think very hard on what I’m going to say, and keep repeating in my head and making sure it doesn’t sound stupid, lol. I’m not a natural speaker where words just flow out of my mouth. I always envy people who can speak really well, hopefully by the end of the course, we’ll both be just like them or better! Haha, all the best to you and your FYP!
guoren
Hi Madhu,
ReplyDeleteI do understand how you feel. Presenting in front of a huge audience can indeed be very nerve-wrecking at times! I also agree with you that the other plus points of being able to communicate effectively include building solid and lasting relationships with family, friends and colleagues.
With all the gadgets such as the mobile phone and msn chat, it has to a certain extent hampered our skills in terms of communication. This also brings to mind that we cannot speak the way we write which may often times act as a barrier when it comes to verbally communicating effectively.
I hope ES2007s has allowed you to open up more and be able to gain the confidence to give better and in effective presentations! All the best for your FYP and thank you for sharing! =)
Cheers,
Bryan
Hi Madhu,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you in that effective communication skills are essential in building and maintaining relationships, and that listening is just as important as speaking. I think that with the ongoing rat race in Singapore, people are often too anxious to put their ideas forward and they forget to listen to what the other party is trying to say. When both people are speaking at the same time, and no one is listening, ideas tend not to get across, and nothing is achieved. This somewhat hampers the development of ideas and causes miscommunication. Hence I think that it is very important that people stop to listen once in awhile.
Your situation is understandable. Public speaking can really be a very daunting task. Being shy by nature, it must not have been easy for you having to present in front of classes and other people. Kudos for trying your best!
I'm sure you have a very interesting personality just waiting to blossom from your shy exterior at the very first opportunity! Don't be afraid of speaking up and speaking your mind! Practice makes perfect! If you do it often enough, it will start to come naturally to you (: I hope it happens that way for you. (:
Good luck for your FYP! (:
Best,
Clarence
Hi Madhu, personally i feel that being quiet is not really such a bad thing. Whenever i'm quiet (should i put it as nothing to say as i'm usually quite crappy) i end up listening more to what others have to say. As compared to when i'm talking most of the time, i feel that i understand what other are trying to say much much better. If you are talking most of the time, chances are your head would be thinking about what you are going to say next and not really listen to other peoples' views and opinions are. Attentive listeners usually gives the more useful comments and ideas as they have a very clear picture of what others are trying to say. I believe you and Guoren are among those attentive listener right? =)
ReplyDeleteWell anyway, i think you'll have lots of opportunity to speak your mind in ES2007S but remember to listen actively too ya.
Dear Madhu,
ReplyDeleteThank you for the very clear and concise post! It has generated a good number of comments too - fantastic job!
Effective communication is really about the fine-tuning of the communication process. It should not be a "tedious and nerve wrecking task", but rather an enjoyable and meaningful experience. You will find that teamwork is an integral part of ES2007S as it gives all of you the opportunity to practice and work on your communication skills in an environment that embraces constructive comments and review. What can I say except for you to have fun with your group members and classmates!
Cheers,
Ms. Lim
Hey Madhu!
ReplyDeleteLike the other posts reflect, fear of public speaking seems to be a widespread thing. And I believe that the best way to overcome one's fears is to jump right in and do it over and over again! With a receptive class like ours, this would be a perfect time to do so, as I'm sure you are already. In general, people are quite open to hearing your opinions once the ball starts rolling. Though the insecurity that what I say might not be good enough can still plaque me from time to time.
I find having a mental checklist of the essential points extremely useful when presenting things to an audience or communicating new ideas to peers. It enables for both the sender and the receiver to have common "route markers" and gives flow to the presentation. This, again, comes with much practice. I'm working on it too.
Anyway, this comment is running too long. Good luck with your FYP. You might be shy but from working with you in the previous sessions, I can see you have a great personality! Really looking forward working with you again.
Regards,
Jayanthi